Today I did something I swore I’d never do

I sounded like my mother. (Sorry Mum – you are really ace.)

But what I once saw as “Mum losing her shit”, I now see as a completely rational and failproof way to make my kids PICK UP AFTER THEMSELVES!!

Meet my adorable pigs children.

I’m convinced they place bets each day on how much of their stuff I can pick up.  Yes, dropping their crap wherever they stand – that’s their thing. Toys, clothes, iPods, pencils, food, even last night’s nappy. On the floor, in the car, kitchen bench, dining room table, bathroom, on my bed, on us.  Disgusting.

Please note:  this is in no way a reflection of our parenting skills!

Pigs, I tell you.  I grumble and mutter and rant and rave.  Falling on deaf ears.  I might get a ‘here she goes again’ roll of the eyes.  If I’m lucky.

And it’s fair enough really isn’t it?  Young kids just DO NOT HAVE THE ENERGY to put their stuff away.  They do however find their ZING when a bike ride, swim, or surfing is mentioned.  They do not lack vitality when it comes to annoying each other or myself.

So today I did ‘a Mum’.  I LOST MY SHIT.

Not the first time.  But certainly memorable.

It felt good too.

All the stuff on the ground, table, bench, car floor, anything I could find that did not belong there: I chucked it ALL IN THE BIN.

It worked for Mum when I was a child.  It worked for me today.  It had the same effect on the kids today as it had on me years ago.  MASS DEVASTATION.

You know, some tricks never grow old.  They just take on a new perspective as you get older: Crazy & completely over the top when I was a child vs. pushing the right buttons to get your kids to do stuff now.

And I left them hanging.  For a good few hours.  Let it sink in.  Consequences for actions (well non-actions really).

Thankfully I had the rationale to use a new, clean garbage bag.  I might have been doing my ‘narna, but I wasn’t going to fork out hundreds of dollars for new crap for the kids to leave lying around again.

Finally when I let the girls have all their stuff back by dumping it out of the garbage bag and onto the lounge room floor, they scrambled for their belongings and left to put them away quick-smart.

There I was.  Happy.  This age-old, crazy-arse strategy, passed down through the generations had worked.  I GOT THEM TO PICK THEIR UP THEIR SHIT.

I was so smug.

Until an hour later.  When I found all the crap dumped randomly in their bedroom.

Here we go again.

Keep it clean, Amy x


4 thoughts on “Today I did something I swore I’d never do

  1. Hey – you win some, you lose some.

    I felt like my mum this morning. We were driving to school this morning & my daughter was playing her music – and I was telling her to skip the song, then the next one…and what kind of rubbish is this that she’s got on her phone. And then I remembered my mum saying the same about my choice of music when I was 14. And that was when I just shut up & kept driving ;o)

  2. We quite often get a bin bag out and wave it around at them lol! My mum used to threaten to throw everything from my bedroom floor out of the window and onto the lawn so everyone could see it (she never actually did it). But on sounding like our parents, Mr P definitely sounded like an old man the other day. We had a weekend away… Without children! We had a leisurely wander round the shops and he pointed to a pair of skinny jeans and said “those are very popular with the kids nowadays”!!! I doubled up laughing at him, couldn’t help it!!

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